I am so fried today!! It's one of those days...you know...the kind of day that you wake up soo tired and you drank soo much coffee that your nerves are twiching just below the surface and your eyes look like you've been passing the peace pipe and your brain has a hard time keeping up with your mouth...um ya well it's that kind of day for me!! I was just coloring someone's hair and I had this surreal out of body experience. I was telling a story about something Isaac did and sloshing haircolor onto her head and I realized that I was talking so very fast that I wasn't really sure where I was going next! I looked at her and I thought, is she listening? Why am I telling this story? I'm sure people get so sick of hearing about my son I feel like Kathy Lee Gifford right about now...but AH what-ever. Do you ever have those kinds of days? Or is it just me? Maybe it's just me. I hope not. Well, that's all for today.

Tonight it's late...

Now that some time has passed since I wrote my disclaimer, I'm feeling the urge to write again. And yet I cannot for the life of me decide what to say. Tonight I had two meaningful conversations with people. The first is one of my very dear friends soon to be moving to Uganda and the other an old friend who has moved away. I am so thankful to have this handful of people in my life that can see beyond the immediate and look inside of me and pull out the greater things. I highly reccommend it. Get some people like this in your life. Life is not always as you wish it to be. And some people might revel in the low moments of others. And if your life is surrounded by folks like this, then my advice to you is to scrap it and make some new friends. You see a true friend looks beyond the momentary struggles and external constraints and speaks to the greatness, the goodness, the powerful person inside of you and calls that person forth. Through many trials we enter the Kingdom. These trial often are to help us shed off character flaws like an old garment. Walking through the process of wrong choices causes us to walk away from strife and into the Kingdome of God. I am seeking the peace of God. Jesus said that His peace He left with us. And I am looking for His peace to fill me as Paul said whether I am abased or abound. Jesus has been re-focusing my eyes upon him. He has been causing me to walk in a way that in these days I have had to go back and make some things right that I made wrong. We cannot cry out for Justice with bloodied hands. His love is primary thing. His love is central to what we need. His love is the essence. His love is the substance that I need to be smeared in, dunked in, bathed in, drowned in, until I am full.

Disclaimer!!

So I guess this is my first blog ever. I'm not sure if it's something I will do consistantly or just when I have a flash of ideas that need to get out of my brain. This blog is not a family update blog, although I will probably write things about my family. You may read things in this blog that you don't agree with, spiritual ideas that don't match yours might appear on this blog. Run on sentences are a grammatical weakness that I fancy. If I'm writing late at night, you could sense a bit of a dark mood with a dash of paranoia. Blogging strikes me one of two ways. We as a society are, in my opinion, somewhat self obsessed. I remember when a magazine called "Self" came out in the 90's. I thought that the next logical greatest magazine to hit the grocery store aisle's would be "Me". Or maybe it would be "Me, myself, and I" or possibly "Ego" or "Id". But instead the next best thing became "Myspace". And then of course we have "Facebook". And so you may find that on this blog I poke fun at our culture, or write about things that bug me. But just know this, I am not one that stands from the outside and turns my nose up at our life as Americans, pointing my finger at all that doth offend. But I am the one, while reading "Self" magazine and checking my FB, will have moments where I stand outside life and swim in the Irony of it. And I also may write something about the things that do offend me too. I love poetry, and I write it as well. But I have no idea wether or not my poetry is trite drivel or just really bad. Please excuse this indulgence of mine. You may notice contradictions in my blog. One week I may be full of encouragement and zeal for life, and the next week I may be coy and feeling rather blue. Also, it should be noted that often I am sleep deprived for many a different reason. This blog may show the core of my thoughts. It may show the essence of my person. Like walking past a mirror quickly, you may get glimpses inside of me, and inside of you. And that I believe, no matter how self absorbed people may be, is part of the experience of being human. Happy reading.